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April 5, 2005

The Joe Theismann of College Basketball

Billy Packer almost ruins the NCAA tournament. Again.

Every year that I watch the NCAA Basketball Tournament -- a.k.a. March Madness (TM) and The Big Dance (TM) -- I say the same two things: (1) Man, the whole idea of a big knockout tournament where everyone plays their hearts out is just awesome -- I love this thing; (2) Why is this glorious sporting event sullied by the semi-sentient Billy Packer?

I thought about just going on and on about how much I disliked Billy Packer. There's certainly plenty to talk about, and I don't have anyone to stop me from calling the man lots of impolite names. I find him incompetent and insufferable. Sports on TV are entertainment products, and the presence of Billy Packer negatively impacts my enjoyment of said entertainment. Although there is certainly no shortage of blathermonkeys offering half-baked opinions on any number of television programs/ web sites, Billy Packer stands out as one of the worst -- one of the few that is so bad that they distract me from enjoying the entertainment product in question. And not even in a Howard Cosell "controversial" way -- more in a ESPN Sunday Night Football "grossly incompetent" sort of way.

I know that makes me sound like the sort of troglodyte who sits on his couch armed with beer and remote shouting at the disembodied voices that accompany the entertainment products. (As it turns out, that statement is only 73 percent true). So instead of calling Billy Packer names, I'm going to point out why he is very bad at his job.

For a national broadcast of a large sporting event, where the audience will have a national (and even global footprint), the commentators are expected -- at a minimum -- to (a) clearly describe the action that is taking place, (b) offer additional information to viewers that explains the action on the court as well as the larger thematic context, and (c) remain non-partisan out of respect for the broad national audience. On last night's telecast of the NCAA Men's Basketball Championship game, Billy Packer failed at all three:

(a) Clearly describe the action that is taking place: for a couple games, it had been obvious that Illinois were taking liberties with the rules about setting screens and picks. That is, the Illinois big men were setting clean picks on an initial defender and then, in the act of going to set another pick, would continue to screen off opponents. You're not allowed to move while you set a pick. It's a rule. Billy Packer did not point this out until about there were two minutes left in the game, ostensibly after one of his producers had shouted sufficiently in his ear about it. In fact, Billy Packer kept talking about Illinois' skill in setting screens (see below).

(b) Offer additional information to viewers that explains the action on the court as well as the larger thematic context: in explaining Illinois' success on offense, Packer repeatedly -- and I mean, REPEATEDLY -- complimented the strength and effectiveness of the Illinois players setting picks. That is, he believed that Illinois was doing a good job of scoring because they were setting good picks. Which is almost true, were it not for the fact that a lot of those screens looked dicey (and which he finally pointed out). A more cogent way to explain this would have been that Illinois figured out early on that they weren't going to get called for moving picks and were playing -- like a smart team -- to the specs of the officiating crew. Billy Packer tried to say that, but it didn't quite come out clearly.

(c) Remain non-partisan out of respect for the broad national audience: it's tough to prove media bias, but Billy Packer definitely declared an Illinois three-point-field-goal attempt in the final two minutes to be "Good" when it had not yet reached the goal and was, in fact, not "Good" but rather a "Miss." Said three-pointer would have confirmed the Illinois "run" he was so excited about, and might have capped off the "comeback" that didn't "happen." Note that this statement also violates Section (a) (above).

That's it. I'll stop. No more Billy Packer rants. I can at least take some solace in the fact that he isn't remotely involved in professional football.

Posted by thatkid at April 5, 2005 2:49 PM under Sports

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