ThatKidInTheCorner

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June 27, 2005

Maybe You Can't Say "Dirty Argie" On TV

In which we import a British ethnic slur to better explain the success of Argentine Manu Ginobili

In the space of ten months, Argentine forward Manu Ginobili has won the NBA Championship with the San Antonio Spurs and the Olympic gold medal with Argentina (besting his Spurs teammate Tim Duncan in the process). Not a bad haul for a guy that most American basketball fans had never heard of as of four years ago. In fact, this was the first year that Ginobili was even a full-time starter for the Spurs -- and yet by the end of the season, the NBA blathermonkeys were tripping over themselves to praise Ginobili's "gritty all-around game" and basketball IQ (especially once the Heat and young Master Wade were eliminated).

At the same time, the praise for Ginobili has been tempered somewhat by accusations of unsportsmanlike play. Specifically, certain opponents (and more than a few opposing fans) will readily assert that Ginobili is the most egregious flopper the NBA has seen since the prime of Vlade Divacs. Not that flopping is against the rules, per se (certainly not as it exists in soccer, where it is a bookable offense), and not that star players don’t routinely exaggerate body contact to influence referees’ whistles, but the boldness with which Ginobili has come to launch himself backwards at the mere suggestion of impact has earned him something of a reputation among NBA fans.

While it would certainly be tempting to connect the dots from Divacs to Ginobili and generalize that international players have more of a predilection for flopping than do American players (the legacy of Bill Laimbeer notwithstanding), there exists a far more elegant connection. For if we were to show Ginobili’s on-court flopping to any self-respecting British sport fan and then explain that Manu was from Argentina, their explanation would be quick and decisive: well of course this Ginobili is a dirty argie.

Dirty argie. This is the catchall Brit term for behavior (typically sporting) from Argentines that they categorize as unfair, sneaky or otherwise not in tune with the agreed upon customs of good sportsmanship. Mostly it’s their way of asserting that Argentine players have a penchant for cheating. Though I wouldn’t presuppose to be able to explain the deeper sources of British-Argentine animosity, we can safely assume that the 1982 Falklands War has something to do with it.

Of course, wars are wars, and there is something that both nations take a bit more seriously than even armed conflicts: the quadrennial FIFA World Cup. Though every soccer fan in every nation has a tale of woe relating to some questionable refereeing decision that cost their country/ favorite club some important or otherwise deserved victory, perhaps the most famous bad call of the past 30 years was Argentine Diego Maradona’s “Hand Of God” goal against England in the 1986 World Cup. As the endless television replays incontrovertibly demonstrated, Maradona used his hand (and not his head) to punch home a goal against England, and later cheekily explained that it was actually the hand of God, and not his, that scored the goal. Brits remain outraged by the goal to this day (though they don’t have so much to say about the other goal he scored against them, in which he dribbled 60 yards through the entire England defense before flipping the ball past England keeper Peter Shilton).

Argentina and England met again at the 1998 World Cup in France, and this time it was a different Diego, Diego Simeone, who earned the ire of English supporters with a flopjob that got England star David Beckham tossed from the game – and England essentially bounced from the tournament. Though it was certainly a silly move for Beckham to have lunged at Simeone following a tough tackle, Simeone “made a meal of it”by acting as though he’d just absorbed a volley of heavy artillery and collapsed writhing to the ground (when barely any contact had been made). The incident may be the defining moment of Beckham’s career (though Beckham could change that if he continues to miss important penalties) and he claims that the Argentine players taunted him mercilessly after the game in the parking lot (I guess Becks’ precious feelings were bruised). Simeone (not exactly the most graceful or skillful player) didn’t have a cheeky explanation or name for the flop – he was just happy to have helped his team win the game.

Is it fair to apply this admittedly prejudicial and nasty stereotype to Ginobili? Probably not. He’s a good player and his flopping doesn’t ruin the NBA (in the way that some soccer players’ persistent simulation can render games unwatchable). I’m just surprised that I haven’t read or heard a single word from the blathermonkeys on the topic. Maybe they’re just being polite, or maybe they don’t care much for soccer, but it seems pretty unforgivable that no one (not even on the Internet!) has mentioned it. (Someone needs to get Sir Charles in a room with an excitable English dude and some soccer tapes – I guarantee we hear “Dirty Argie” broadcast live on TNT within hours.)

At the same time, it’s a pretty ugly term, and a pretty broad stereotype to apply (and one which most certainly involves some English jealousy about Argentina’s successes over the past 30 years in international football) to a large and diverse nation. But in a sporting culture where the Washington Redskins and the Notre Dame Fighting Irish are perfectly acceptable, a little jingoism wouldn’t shock me.

Note: everything I said in the previous post about my computer working well was a complete lie. Structural problems persist. Sigh.

Posted by thatkid at 1:00 PM | Comments (0)

June 23, 2005

Back And Ready To Sign

In which I rejoice in my newly resurrected PC; also, some random notes

And we're back.

Much like CNN International in China returning from a programming interruption/ censorship opportunity ("And in Beijing today...[blank screen, 45 seconds of silence, and then we return to]...while in Tokyo...."), we are back in the United States of Freedom, land of potable water and operational indoor plumbing (except in our apartment, of course)!

But we're not just back in the United States. We're back on my Compaq Presario 700, albeit with a new hard drive. As loyal readers (or anyone who's seen me cursing at my computer over the past 10 months) are well aware, my computer has been on his last legs for a long time now. To paraphrase Michael Corleone, it's been dying of the same design flaw for a full year.

Until now.

In retrospect, it's pretty embarrassing that it took me this long to fix the stupid thing. You mean all I needed was a new internal hard drive? I thought that the connection between the hard drive and the rest of the machine was permanently damaged (which made sense because I used to have a habit of picking the machine up with just one hand on the corner where the hard drive sits). Maybe that was part of it, but now that I replaced the drive it's working beautifully.

(Allow me a brief indulgence/ digression here as I savor how cool I felt using little tiny screwdrivers to remove the old drive and insert the new one. This is me, savoring. Very satisfying to be able to repair your PC based on a quick web search and some random web page. Collective wisdom of the Internet, you rawk.)

(Allow me a second indulgence/ digression where I postulate that fixing computers/ technology object is to the digital generation what tinkering under the hood of the car was to the baby boomers. Discuss.)

In any case, the new machine is just humming along. It's actually quite lovely to have a virgin PC devoid of all the crap that accumulates on one's system (whether you like it or not). Maybe the best part is that the damn thing boots up in under a minute (whilst before it took the better part of ten minutes and some serious cajoling to even open the first application). At this point, I might even -- GASP! -- risk picking up the machine and moving it to another room! Mostly I'm just happy to be rid of my erstwhile hard drive.

Beyond fixing my puter, and in lieu of a proper posting about an actual topic (don't worry, normalcy returns soon), some random notes from the past week:

Our Number One Diplomatic Priority: not only my future employer but also the President met with the Vietnamese Prime Minister over the past week. Dear Mr. President, see if you can get the Vietnamese to do something about the scam with the taxis at the Hanoi airport. A polite request would be fine; no need for the cruise missiles this time. Thank You. Yours faithfully, Me.

Young Master Adu: Awman. Seriously, Freddy Adu, we want to believe. We want to buy your jersey. We want to stay on the bandwagon, just because we're excited that the bandwagon might actually be legit. But you need to get better at soccer. You can definitely do tricks with the ball (and make some of them work) better than most players at the top level of the game. But you don't really know how to play soccer yet. That is, you don't know how to harness your immense talent to being good at soccer. You'll figure it out. You will. But I think they need to get you in a different situation and I think you need to get your ass kicked around a bit. You need to lose some, so we can see if you really want to win. I think a change would be good.

They Changed Cable Channels On Me: right, so they moved HBO (only the lower outpost) and YES (promoted it to 30! With the other sports networks). In case you're scoring at home.

And The Seas Boiled, And The Skies Fell: did I really just see Paris Hilton doing an in-house promo for Fox Soccer Channel ("I'm Paris Hilton, and you're watching Fox Soccer Channel") as a cross-promotion for The Simple Life (logo in background)?

My Favorite Doomsday Scenario: and this might necessitate a full entry, but, the Batman movie (which was AWESOME) used my favorite NYC Doomsday Scenario -- a toxic agent such that they had to seal off the island to prevent the toxin from escaping. The bridges and the tunnels are sealed. No way off the island. You just have to sit here and wait to die, as the island descends into madness and chaos. I know. Pretty horrible. (The runner up for favorite NYC Doomsday Scenario is trapped in a subway car when the tsunami hits New York City. Let me know if you think this is a problem. I'm curious.) Anyway, it's a pretty good idea for bad-guy evil plot, as far as this genre goes, and the movie is pretty exceptional across the board. They finally made the dark Comic Book movie that they've been telling us they've been making for the past 15 years. Again, this should be a whole posting from me.

Anyway, it's nice to be home. I kind of think the Pistons will win. So that's my big prediction.

Posted by thatkid at 8:48 PM | Comments (0)

June 16, 2005

Mad Props For Karma

In which the Gods balance the cosmic scales and smile fondly upon us in Hanoi

I wouldn't say that I was feeling terribly great about Hanoi the last time I posted. It was hot and loud and we had just been scammed by a bunch of uniformed officials at the airport. (I think it was the structural nature of the scam that was so unsettling; it wasn't like we got in the wrong cab. Anyhoo).

Things have really improved since then.

We did two-days-one-night tour with ODC Travel ("Small Groups, Big Adventure!") on Halong Bay. Complete touchdown. There were only ten of us on the boat (the aforementioned "small group"), and we had a blast (see above, "big adventure"). Met some fun folks, saw some gorgeous stuff, got to explore the bay on kayaks for a bit (which completely rocked), and generally had a great time. And, in an even more fortuitous turn of events, a gigantic thunderstorm started just as we reached the harbor on the second day (which effectively cancelled that day's tours).

So, we thought, karma was on our side.

Oh, but it gets even better.

We had decided after the debacle with the hotels on Monday that we would treat ourselves to a nicer hotel for what would be our final night of the trip. I mean, we didn't spend a fortune ($50/ person) but we figured that we would indulge ourselves. Why not.

We arrive at said nicer hotel and discover that they don't have any more of our chosen class of room (that being the "cheapest room" in the hotel) available. Errr, okay. As a result, they've taken the liberty of upgrading us to the executive suite.

Perhaps!

Wow, we think, karma is really hooking us up.

But oh, we aren't even done yet.

We had been trying to meet my travelling companion's cousin by marriage (who works in Vietnam, though he's Indonesian by birth and ethnically Chinese) for the past week, with limited success. Ships in the night and whatnot. We finally meet him last night, have dinner, and in his generosity (and through the largess of the multinational poultry concern at which he is employed) we have, ahem, a DRIVER for the day today.

Are you kidding me?

So yeah, we've been tooling around town with this guy who's shown us the sights, taken us to the touristy stuff, showed us the cool local place to get the pho noodles, and helped us through some shopping and souvenir acquisition. Pretty nifty.

And who said we were having bad luck in Hanoi?

In any case, we're off to the airport shortly for the 30-hour trip home. The next time you hear from me, it'll be back in the United States of Freedom.

It's been real.

Posted by thatkid at 1:02 AM | Comments (0)

June 13, 2005

Nearly Shanghaied In Hanoi

In which we can attest to the value of the Lonely Planet guidebook for Vietnam

My last post talked a lot of game about how we were "planning" to go to Hanoi the following day. Right. So that didn't "exactly" happen. Apparently that Saturday (when we were planning to travel) was some sort of holiday. The bad news was that we couldn't get on a flight to Hanoi that day. The worse news was that we also couldn't get on a flight to Hanoi the following day. Uh oh. (Vietnam Airlines isn't entirely uncomplicated in re: their customer service and ticket purchasing functions.)

So we improvised a bit. We decided to stay in Hoi An for one more day, then do a day in Nha Trang (this translates as "we decided to go to the beach for a day") and then head to Hanoi on Monday. Today.

And here we are.

The trip was not without its excitement, though. Highlights and bulletpoints from the past couple days....

Municipal Waste Management Presented By Mister Softee: the first time we heard the overblown calliope noise coming down the street, we just assumed it was the Vietnamese version of the Ice Cream Man. Not exactly. Turns out it was the garbage truck, which for some reason plays ridiculously cheery and repetitive children's music as it crawls down the street. Kind of hilarious. It's like a big garbage party, and everyone's invited!

Year Of The Smurf: not to get down on dragons, cause dragons are definitely conceptually cool, but all the other "Year Of" animals actually exist. I'm just sayin. Is all.

The Good People At The Ancient House Resort, Hoi An: can't say enough about these folks. After our debacle with the airplanes (which required that we stay an extra night at their hotel) they actually insisted on giving us a free meal. And not a small meal. Like five courses. Because we couldn't get airline tickets. If you're ever in Hoi An, these folks are the ticket. Also, they let you have a bike to tool around town with for the duration of your stay. I already miss ole Number 12.

I Say I-I-I-I I Want The Knife. Pleeeeeeeeaaaase: as part of our extra day in Hoi An, we decided to go on one of the local tourist excursions. It was, ahem, pretty silly, highlighted by a presentation of the "magic table." The magic table was a lazy susan on which you placed your palms to allow your mind to "control" the direction of the rotation. Errr, right. In our defense, I think we did a pretty good job of not breaking into uncontrollable laughter during this session, though we were polite enough to remove our hats. Since it was a holy place. (Tourists traps are very sacred in Vietnam.)

Barbecues Every Day, No More Living Hard: had one of the best meals of the trip last night in Nha Trang. You got to BBQ your own dinner at the table on a small charcoal grill. AWESOME, especially after the proprietor explained how all the sauces worked, and demonstrated how to dip the baguette in the marinade and grill it as well. (Note that this just led us to begin grilling our french fries as well, but hey, we're on vacation.)

A Quick Note About Traffic Laws in Vietnam: when the books say that there aren't any, they are NOT exaggerating. It's ridiculous. People are just whizzing everywhere, all the time. We've seen scores of motorscooters loaded with four (4) passengers (typically including two children). I can't believe we haven't witnessed an accident yet. In lieu of an organized system of traffic regulations, the Vietnamese just honk their horn at people (pedestrians, bicycles, motorbikes, cars) to warn them to get the hell out of the way. This means it's INSANELY LOUD anywhere near a street. But, hey, I guess it works for them.

Thank You, Folks At Lonely Planet: the Lonely Planet guidebook for Vietnam's entry on "Scams" in Hanoi reads as follows:

One unfortunate development in Hanoi has been hustlers moving into the hotel market. They rent a building, appropriate the name of another hotel, and then work with the touts to bring unwitting tourists to their 'chosen' location....Airport taxis and minibuses often work in partnership with these copycat hotels, as they give the biggest commissions.

So that's pretty much exactly what happened to us today.

For the record, if the good people from the "Phucking" Phuc Loi hotel had picked us up at the airport as they said they would in their e-mail (when they confirmed our reservation), none of this would have happened. But they didn't show, and we had to switch to plan B. Plan B involved us hiring a cab to take us to the Classic Street Hotel. We talked to a cabbie, who took us out to meet the "head" cabbie guy, who summoned another cabbie, who then spoke with the guy in the Vietnamese Army uniform and put us in a cab. It was not a sketchy cab, but an official cab like all the others.

We started to suspect something was up when the cabbie made an unexpected stop at the cabbie depot to talk to some of the other cabbies and didn't explain why he was stopping (we just figured he didn't speak much English). The ride into town was interesting and odd, but hey, most things here are.

Things got extra-fishy when we stopped in front of a hotel in the Old Quarter and some dude jumped into the front seat of the cab, presented us with a business card from the Classic Street Hotel, and politely explained that they were out of rooms but that they owned another hotel down the street that was even nicer. Err, okay. I mean, he did have the business card. He said we were going to the Prince Hotel, which I had remembered reading about. Sounds good.

The "Prince Hotel" was a complete dump. Also it wasn't the Prince Hotel. (The guidebook had described it as a nice place.) The Lonely Planet scam we had read about was actually happening to us! How exciting! We looked at a room (since we did need a hotel) and decided we needed to hightail it out of there. Immediately.

What's nice is that they didn't get any money out of us (other than the cab fare, for which we paid the posted rate from the airport). What's not so nice is that we had to wander through the touts, hustlers, and deafening traffic (as the sidewalks are clogged with parked motorbikes, makeshift kitchens, and other improvised retail environments) for 45 minutes with our backpacks in the heat until we found our actual hotel. Not so fun. Mad props to the guy who was trying to sell us a motorcycle ride who actually didn't lie to us about where we were (the only person until that point in this adventure who actually told us the truth). That was huge.

It's pretty remarkable how many people were in on this -- especially, as we later observed, since they didn't actually make any money on the deal. No fewer than five people at the airport, including the dude in the army uniform, must have been in on it. The unexplained stop at the cab depot had to be to tell the other guys to phone ahead to the hotel people and let them know to dig out their fake Classic Street Hotel card. Pretty complicated stuff all around. And, luckily for us, all for phucing naught!

(It's worth noting that the actual Classic Street Hotel is perfectly fine and the guy who works there has been extremely helpful and kind to us. In general, as noted earlier, the people here have been lovely.)

Next Up: Tomorrow we head out of Hanoi for two days to check out Halong Bay. I believe we're sleeping aboard a boat tomorrow night. Should be cool. Or at least quiet.

Posted by thatkid at 9:37 AM | Comments (0)

June 10, 2005

Home Of The Shiny Green Suit

In which we have an awesome time in Hoi An and break the awful truth about Paris Hilton to some interested locals

Unlike the United States of Freedom, our group had little trouble leaving Saigon. I mean, Ho Chi Minh City. We were there for about 20 hours total. It wasn't a bad 20 hours, but I wouldn't say we were disappointed to skedaddle. It was pretty Big Cityish, and we were in a pretty Backpackery part, and I think we needed a change of pace.

And a change of pace we got! We got to Hoi An yesterday afternoon and have had a complete blast. Great stuff here. The people have been extremely friendly and welcoming, and we really can't say enough good things about this town. Some yarns and bulletpoints....

Just Like Saville Row, Only Really Cheap and You Can't Drink The Water: so the deal in Hoi An is that the town is filled with shops where they'll make you custom-tailored/ from-scratch clothes. You pick the fabric, point to a picture in a magazine, and four hours later, you've got a shirt/ suit/ tuxedo/ etc. Pretty cool. Also, it costs next to nothing.

New Math: in re: things being really cheap, it's stopped making sense to compare prices to their dollar equivalents. It's just useless. I mean, when a three-course meal with drinks runs you $6/ person (and it's good) you realize that dollars just aren't the right benchmark. I spend more than that on a sandwich in New York. As an alternative, I've found myself making more internal Vietnamese comparisons, e.g. "This t-shirt is worth two-and-a-half bottled waters." It's really the only way to make sense of it.

Vietnamese Food: The Big Secret: as noted in the last post, I realize that I prefer Vietnamese food over Chinese food. Knew this before I came here. What I didn't know was the Big Secret about Vietnamese food in Vietnam. In general, my struggle with SE Asian cuisine tends to be that unless I order noodles, I don't get the blast of carbohydrates that my Western diet has trained my body to expect. However, due to French imperialism, there remain vestiges of French cuisine on all of the menus we've encountered. That is, THEY HAVE BREAD. So, I can go nuts with the Vietnamese food and satisfy my craving for empty carbs with, wait for it, garlic bread on the side. This is me rubbing my belly and smiling.

Things That Remind Me That I'm Both An Ugly American and A Bad Person: I keep feeling the overwhelming desire to quote Vietnam movies (with special emphasis on Good Morning Vietnam and Walter Sobchak's lines from Lebowski). I'd like it noted for the record that I've managed to restrain myself, with the possible exception of when we saw the Vietnamese kid surfing at the beach today. (See if you can figure out what I said...yes, there it is.) Honestly, that wasn't my fault. It really couldn't be helped. (I'll blame growing up in our media-saturated culture and leave it at that.)

Errr, The Not-So-Recent Unpleasantness: despite the fact that everyone told me that folks in Vietnam were really friendly, I guess I expected at least some resentment from the locals when they found out we were American. All things considered, our government did do some unkind things here just 30 years ago. I mean, I'm used to taking grief from Western Europeans for being American, and all we ever did for them was to help them not lose WWII. So mad props to the locals (with the exception of the busboy at dinner tonight who told me that "I'd be killed" if I told anyone I was American in Hanoi) for being so chill -- I hope I've been a good citizen whilst I've been in-country. (And it makes you wonder when we'll be able to travel like this to Iraq? Twenty years? Thirty years?)

He Wants To Buy Naked Pictures of Walter Brennan: so one of our tailors today was essentially the guy who runs the bar in Good Morning Vietnam. You know the guy. The one with the shiny green suit. Completely over the top. So this is what the tour book said when it described him as "irrepressible." Mr. "See." Definitely stop by his shop if ever in Hoi An. Worth it if only for the conversation.

Page Six Comes to Vietnam: as we were waiting at said shop for a friend to have his measurements taken, I was flipping through a copy of Cosmo (which they essentially use as a caatalog -- you point, they can make it) with one of the the 16-year-old sales girls in the shop. Very nice girl, very eager to practice her English with me. So she's flipping along, asking me if I know who this or that person is, and we land on a Guess ad featuring Paris Hilton. She asks me if I know who she is. I say yes. She says that she likes Paris very much and did I know that she is very rich? I did know that, I said. She is very famous, the girl said. I agreed. Then (in a moment of extreme couldn't-help-myself-weakness) I asked her if she knew why Paris was famous. Because she's pretty? No, I said. (At this point Mr. See started to perk up. Apparently he was interested as well.) And thus I began to carefully explain, using simple but polite English words, that Paris was famous because, and I quote here, "she -- how do you say -- had sex on videotape and put it on the Internet?" Mr. See glanced at me and said something angry that I didn't understand. The girl cross-examined -- she didn't believe it. I assured her that this was the case -- it was all over the place. Mr. See got even angrier. I don't know what he was saying, but my guess is that those weren't happy words. I mean, I didn't mean to be talking out of school about people, but the girl should at least know what this person that she was so fascinated by was really all about (not to get all South Park about it). You know, before she asks Mr. See to make her a Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset.

Next Up: we head north to Hanoi tomorrow as part of our quest to only visit places whose names are anagrams of each other.

Posted by thatkid at 10:53 PM | Comments (0)

June 8, 2005

I Was In Junior High Comma SomethingHead

Enough of that so-called Middle Kingdom; time to get in-country

And we're back! Some minor technical problems with that last posting (which have since been remedied) due to the, ahem, rather restrictive policies in re: the electric internet in the PRC. Mad props to the other half of ThatKid for hooking things together whilst I was relatively incommunicado. Posts should be more lively over the next week since the Commies in Vietnam don't seem to be as effective in censoring the Internet as the Commies in China.

We just arrived in Saigon/ HCMC for a brief stopover before heading north. Not too much to report from Vietnam yet, other than (a) this trip will confirm that I really do like Vietnamese food more than Chinese food (it's a Monsoon v. Ollie's thing) and (b) there's a certain thrill to dividing everything by 16,000.

Some quickies on the past couple days....

Look Both Ways Before Crossing: and here we thought the traffic was dangerous in Shangahi -- complete chaos, with buses, cars, motorcycles, scooters, bicycles, and pedestrians sharing very narrow streets. Right. The we rode in a cab from the airport to our hotel in Saigon. Perhaps. If y'all are going to ride your motorcycles like that, please look into a helmet?

And Then We Learned To Say Hello: so apparently the way to say hello in Shanghai is "Ni Hao" and not actually "Watches, Bags, DVDs," or "Sex Massage." Who knew.

Cloud 9: so they have this supercool bar on the 87th floor of the tallest building in Shanghai. And of course we managed to wait til the last day to go there; that is, the only day during our stay that was cloudy. Brilliant.

I Did Not Secure A Copy Of Revenge of the Sith: so despite what you might have heard, they've actually driven the pirated DVD/ Software/ Music biz off the streets. That is, if you were interested in buying pirated DVDs, you need to go into the back room of a legit retail outlet (best-case) or into some unlit second-floor hovel in a slum (worst-case). I wasn't that interested.

Shanghai's Moment of Self-Parody: whilst at the Shanghai Urban Planning Center (really cool place with this giant model of the city that took up an entire floor of the building) they had a display that discussed the importance of environmental protection in Shanghai. A. Hem. This is me trying to laugh but coughing up a ball of sooty phlegm instead.

My Southern New York Accent: in the course of a couple hours I was told that I had a Southern accent (by a German) and then a heavy New York accent (by a Chinese dude). Errr, exactly.

Kentucky Fried Uncle Mao's: in addition to the dozen or so KFCs we saw in Shanghai, there's also a Kentucky Fried Chicken Knockoff featuring, for lack of a better description, a Chinese version of the Colonel on the marquee. Pretty amusing.

Book Report Time: stick me on airplanes for a long time, I tend to read a lot. I think I did a pretty decent job of bringing a bunch of different books on this mission. Here's what I've gotten through so far:

Futebol (Alex Bellos): Brit journo goes to Brasil to try to explain all of Brasilian culture through soccer. Like pretty much all soccer writing (and I've read more footie books than I should admit) it suffers from the inevitable masturbatory fanboy indulgences of the author. Still, it's got some good yarns. Definitely worth it for the chapters on the 1950 World Cup loss, the origin of the Brasil soccer kit, the contrast between Garrincha and Pele (apparently Brasilian people like Garrincha more than Pele), an exposition of the nickname phenomenom, and finally the hullaballo in re: the loss at the 1998 World Cup. I just didn't realize that Ronaldo had to testify before Congress to explain why they lost.

The Unbearable Lightness of Being (Milan Kundera): I don't usually go for novels that are so much about, ahem, feelings, but this was actually really good. The insights and observations resonated and the whole Cold War thing made a lot of sense in the context of reading it in a country that was censoring CNN as I watched it. Need to check out the movie when I get back. (I also need to check out Empire of The Sun again, but for different reasons.)

The Golden Ratio (Mario Livio): so I just read a whole book about phi (1.618....); really juicy stuff that managed to appropriately dumb down the math parts and remain objective about the topic (that is, the author doesn't subscribe to a lot of the attributions of phi to classical architecture and whatnot). Lots of great stuff about the Fibonacci sequence and this thing called Benford's Law that I'm not sure I believe.

Did You Know...:...that they show a clip show version of the Daily Show (featuring a bunch of segments from the previous week) on CNN International/ Asia on Saturdays? Though there's a big disclaimer beforehand, the show runs for 30 minutes with the CNN logo and ticker superimposed on the screen. The most trusted name in news!

That's all for now. We leave Saigon tomorrow morning for points north. More reports as we have them.

Posted by thatkid at 10:36 AM | Comments (0)

June 6, 2005

Shanghai: The Hartford Of Asia

In which we explore sleepy, boring, quiet, clean Shanghai

Yawn. Shanghai is soooooo boring. Nothing to do, nothing to see. The streets are empty at most hours, and there's just no life or excitement to the place. Sure, it has a couple big buildings and some highways (and a few billboards), but after spending a couple days here, it's really no more exciting a city than Hartford, CT. Still, even Hartford has its charms (even if you aren't an insurance regulator):

Cough, Cough, Cough: so we've been hacking and coughing since our plane landed. I mean, I don't know for sure that it's the "air quality," but I do know that neither of us are smokers and we don't have colds. And yet we...just...can't...stop...coughing. Luckily for us, it's apparently totally chill to just spit on the street at any time here. So that's nice. Also, there's that nasty haze in the sky. Errr. Right.

Where The Local Time is ALL THE SAME: did you know that all of China is on Beijing time? I didn't. Pretty amusing, considering how, ahem, gigantic it is.

Our Most Intense Three-Dollar Purchases Since Age Eleven: we hit the big "luxury goods" market yesterday. I guess we were planning to buy more, but the quality of the merchandise was just too high. We didn't want to risk having our stuff stolen during the rest of the trip. Still, I did manage to buy a pair of sunglasses for <$2, a transaction that involved a four-minute argument/ argy-bargy in which I turned my back and walked away twice. Really, it was more about the sport of it than anything else.

What's That Smell?: no, seriously, what's that smell? Please someone e-mail me if they know. (I don't think it's a "good" smell.)

Such Great Heights: though I don't have too much of a feel for things here, I can't say enough about this place called New Heights in the Bund. Ridiculous view of the river and the crazy Death Star building. I was shocked it wasn't more crowded, but I guess it was Sunday night. Still, awesome stuff.

Speaking of Big Buildings: Whoa. There are, ahem, more than a few gigantic buildings in this town (with another dozen apparently under construction, each with a design more ornate than the next. The crazy part is that in addition to actually having fancy structures and whatnot, most also have crazy lights and neon on them as well. It turns out that the future looks a lot more like Blade Runner than it doesn't.

That's all I got for now -- next post will likely be from another country. Until then, keep an eye on the United States of Freedom for us, and, as always, Kao!

Posted by thatkid at 8:55 AM | Comments (0)

June 4, 2005

ThatKid Too Hot For Red China!

Even the commies can't stop ThatKid on the road; they can only contain me....

An apology to begin. I really did mean to post something sooner. I'm travelling in Asia for a couple weeks, and wanted to whip up some content from the road with details of exciting adventures in faraway lands. Right. What I didn't realize was that the Chinese Government "wasn't so down with that." That is, www.thatkidinthecorner.com is not on the list of approved sites. (This probably explains why I have 1.3 billion fewer hits per day than I had projected.) So. The degree of difficulty has been elevated.

Luckily, we have some clever ways around that. (But I can't divulge my Big Secrets.) I was planning to write something a big longer, but I'm in a dark, stale room on the second floor of a building (no sign in English) that is the Shanghai version of an Internet cafe and my space bar doesn't really work. But we soldier on!

Some quick hits from the other side of the world:

On The Wall To Victory?: so we're walking along the Great Wall (and when I say walk I mean climb; definitely was a workout) and I spot a guy with an Eagles hat. Perhaps! I say "Go Birds," we chat for a moment (he was born in Philly, moved a while back, but still roots for the team) and move on. About 30 seconds later we hear some American kid shouting, "TO just needs to shut up and get into camp." What? Is 610 broadcasting live from the Slacks Hoagie Shack at the Great Wall of China? Turns out there was another Eagles fan right behind us and he just couldn't help himself. He saw the guy's hat, started yapping, and a minute later a bunch of us are discussing TO's contract situation. Ridiculous. And hilarious.

Lost In Translations: you tend to run into some funny mistranslations and whatnot whenever you travel, but we have a couple early favorites in the clubhouse right now: (1) "Interdict de faire caca", posted above a toilet in a bar in Ho Hai, and (2) "Strong Violent Alcohol" as the heading for a list of otherwise peaceful vodka drinks on a menu.

Famous Chinese Medical Research Facility: as part of our mission to the Great Wall, our tour guide/ Chief Scamming Agent took us to the Chinese Medical Research Facility, where, following a brief introduction to Chinese medicine (delivered in a small room by an unsmiling nurse straight out of Central Communist Casting) three doctors entered (we were supposed to clap -- no kidding) and offered "free examinations." This meant that they took your pulse and then told you that you needed to buy special Chinese medicines (available at the store downstairs; they take all credit cards). Uh-huh. Now who said they were Communists?

The Forbidden Starbucks: we saw actor Paul Sorvino at the Starbucks in the Forbidden City. Feel free to read that sentence again.

Learn Chinese in Your Car: so we don't know much Chinese, and we struggle to even recognize the words we do know, but we have nailed a couple down: Bu Yao ("Don't Want"-- good for shooing away erstwhile Commies with trinkets), Shieh-Shieh ("Thank You"), Bing Shway ("Ice Water"-- don't drink the water in Shanghai), Gombey ("Chug!"), and Sha Beeeeeeeeeeeeee! (I can't translate that last one, but it sums up my feelings in re: this nonsense with the Internet).

Would love to hear from y'all; feel free to add comments below or shoot me an e-mail. Access has been sparse, but I think I'll be on every couple days or so.

Until then, Kao!

Posted by thatkid at 7:13 AM | Comments (0)